1. There be some shady bars on the side streets of Albany....Palais Royal...Scary stuff right there. It's completely red in there, even the bathroom has red lights. It was all Red Rum Candy Manish so I bolted, nope I didn't even wash my hands. The Soco and Lime shot was pretty good though.
2. This is the one I already knew, I am way too old and voluptuous to be jumping around like my ass was last night. Pee dribbled, my knee popped, and I think I broke my back when I jumped up too fast and my boobie tried to sucker punch me in the lip and then flopped back down real fast.
I was one tired mama when I got home last night.... My head has never hit the pillow so hard. Oh wait I am also pretty sure that my boobie punch/flop issue broke my rib, or at least bruised my underboob too. So when I got into bed I put my pillow under my boobie to create a buffer. That's when it happened..... I was thisclose to falling asleep and I felt it, someone was rubbing mah breasteses... I whipped back the blanket and there he was, all smiles, and seductive eyes. I pushed him aside and told him that I am a taken woman so he should probably leave me alone.
Then.... When I was taking a shower this morning it happened again! I felt eyes on me so I pulled back the shower curtain and saw those damn seductive eyes and smile again. WTF dude???? This is getting ridiculous! This time I threw his ass to the floor, ran to my room, and locked the door. I sat on my bed (have I ever told you how much I love my bed? I love my bed!) and cried, I knew that I had to tell my man what happened. I was just afraid of him getting mad at me, or worse yet kicking my newfound stalker's ass (because truth is, I sometimes get a lady boner when I see him too). I looked deep into my love's eyes and told him the whole story, the boob feeling, the watching me in the shower. His eyes lost their twinkle, he asked me if I knew who it was. I did, but telling him was going to hurt him. Bad.
I was backed into a corner, if I told him who the perv really was he would be crushed, but if I didn't, the freak would keep bothering me. It was time. The truth must come out...... I started crying again, he was begging me to just tell him, that he wouldn't do anything stupid. That's when I blurted it out... " It's Fucking Donnie!!!! Joey. He's the one who touched me." Joey's eyes started to fill with tears. His soul was crushed knowing that one of his boy band mates had crossed the line with his woman. When I left for work he was still just sitting there crying, I just hope he can pull his shit together and forgive Donnie before the August 1st concert!
Oh Joey...... Please forgive me!!!!!!